I discovered my thyroid cancer because I noticed that I had sore throat for quite a long time. From then on, I was constantly palpating my neck area and then I noticed that there was a small nodule that was hard and immovable. I felt anxious about this that I immediately went for a check up to one of my father's doctor. At first the Doctor assured me that my father's case was different because it was primarily caused by smoking, alcohol intake and etc... But then when she checked my neck and was able to palpate the nodule she then assent that it was indeed hard and not movable so she immediately advised me to go for biopsy.
I then went for biopsy. When I received my biopsy result and saw CA printed on it, grief weighed heavily in my heart. I burst into tears. I talked to the Lord saying, "Lord, I am not afraid to die. I am ready for I am assured that I am going to heaven but please Lord I don't want to die like this. My family suffered so much already." My pathologist tried to console me and said that papillary CA is not the life threatening kind of CA. She also proclaimed that it was a blessing in disguise that I had sore throat since I was able to palpate the nodule considering the site was almost negligible. Remarkably, she was glad that she was able to target the right mass in conducting the biopsy otherwise if kept hidden for a long time then I will be unaware that something was wrong and I might just be awaken to discover that the disease has possibly spread beyond cure. We all know cancer is an insidious disease.
It was really the lowest time in my life. I went to another Christian Doctor and he assured me that the kind of cancer I have (papillary cancer) is not fatal, considering my age, the size of the nodule which was less than 1 cm. His advised was to do total thyroidectomy (removal of the entire thyroid gland) and there was no need for me to do RAI treatment (radio active iodine). I will just have to take a life time medication of thyroid hormone.
From there on, fear still bugged my mind. In my thoughts were the following questions:
What if after the surgery it turns out that the CA cells metastasis already. All the more my agony was prolonged because of the postponement of my scheduled surgery due to the death of my Doctor's father.
What if my case is similar to my father's in which the doctor assured that the kind of CA he had does not easily spread but then it was proved otherwise because he died in just just a span of 2 years.
What if I will not be able to eat normally like my father who was fed through tubing's ....
I had so many questions in my minds and so many "what if's".
I also felt bad on how some people tried to comfort me with their saddest expression and gave a remark like "oh, you have cancer!" as if they were suggesting or reminding me to be sad.
At that time no one could comfort me, not my doctor, not my husband and neither my family but amazingly it was on that lowest time of my life in which I had the greatest time with the Lord. Every time I felt fear, I cried out to HIM and I've always felt comforted with an overwhelming joy surpassing all the fear I felt. Only then, I was able to laugh and smile, eat and sleep well. It was the most intimate moment I had with the Lord.
But then, after the surgery, there were moments that I began to lose my faith and started to be anxious again. My worries came to its peak when a year after the surgery, I woke up one day with swollen lymph nodes in my left and right temporal area . From what I learned, studies shows that the spread to lymph nodes of the neck is present in more than 50% of the cancer cases . I burst into tears once more and cried out to the Lord, "Lord is this for real? what is your will upon my life? Help! please speak to me " And then, when I opened my bible the Lord gave me His word in Psalm 30:2-3 "O Lord my God, I cried out to you for help, and restored my health." "You brought me up from the grave, O Lord. You kept me from falling into the pit of death."
It was only after I read that passage that I felt inner peace and believed it was the Lord who had spoken to me. through His word.
I went to the doctor the next day and when he palpated the swollen lymph nodes he also got alarmed and even asked me to go to his associate for a second opinion whether to have my biopsy again or have an RAI treatment immediately. I went to his associate but when I came back to my doctor to finalized my decision I just insisted for him to give me an antibiotic medication first. But deep inside my heart I was taking hold of God's word to me.
And Praise God because after a week, when I went back for check up, the inflammation was gone! I also apologized to my Doctor for being insistent during my last visit and told him that it was because I had a word from the Lord. I think my doctor was touched on how God spoke to me because I could see he was teary eyed when he jot down the verse that I claimed as God's promise. However, he still advised me to go for RAI scan to confirm that it did not spread to other parts of my body.
I took head of my doctor's advise, went for the RAI scan and was overjoyed to confirm that the result was NEGATIVE. Indeed, God is my healer!
To God be the glory!